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Talking it over: Old married couples

I found out recently that being married for several years does not always mean you know everything there is to know about each other. In fact, even if you do learn something about your spouse, you don't always remember it the way you should.

At my Hancock Homemaker's Christmas party we played a game they call Oldieweds -- a version of the Newlyweds game for older married couples. We each answered ten questions about our spouse or things we did during our marriage. Then we got together and compared answers.

It was pretty interesting to see what each of the couples remembered most about each other and what they forgot. The men had a hard time remembering dates such as wedding or first child. They were often very close but not always exact while the women could almost give you the date down to the hour.

One of the questions asked was when the last time the wives received fresh flowers from their husband. There were a lot of far-off looks as the women tried to remember that day. In most cases, it was quite far off but in some, very recent.

The men had no problem recalling every detail of the first car they owned or the type of shirt they liked to wear but some had to really think when asked what color underwear they were wearing, even cheating a bit by looking. They also could remember in fairly good detail how they met their wife and the first date.

My husband impressed me by some of the things he knew about me that we hadn't even discussed. He knew I would love to plant my garden full of tulips and that the place I most wanted to visit was Holland. He also knew the maiden name of my grandmother. He said he just had to go through the names of families within the church where I grew up. He was able to calculate our wedding date accurately and knew my favorite food. He also remembered the last time he brought me fresh flowers, even though they turned out to be silk (it was the thought that counted).

At the end of the game, the points were tallied and surprisingly, my husband and I took second place, just one point short of first. I guess we really do know each other better than I thought. Not bad for 40 years of marriage.